Santa-wash

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire. Jack Frost nipping at your nose. Yuletide carols being sung by a choir. And photoshopped images doing the rounds.

OK, so they weren’t the exact words sung by Nat King Cole. Heck, rounds doesn’t even rhyme with nose. But you get the picture. And if you’re anything like us, you’re probably wishing you hadn’t.

It’s beginning to look like the time of year when press offices send out weird photoshopped images, sprinkling some Christmas magic on some otherwise festive-free products and services. You know, like car washes. What could be less festive than a car wash? Aside from the Grinch and Ebenezer Scrooge enjoying a BBQ in mid July.

Two years ago, the IMO Car Wash Group did its best to convince us “even the busiest person in December has time to wash his sleigh”, which isn’t strictly true. Everybody knows Yodel and DPD drivers are far busier. Father Christmas only has to go to work once a year. Although, to be fair to Santa, at least he’s guaranteed to find your house…

[bctt tweet=”What could be less festive than a car wash? Aside from the Grinch and Ebenezer Scrooge enjoying a BBQ in mid July.”]

According to IMO, Father Christmas was “spotted on a stop off at an IMO car wash”, no doubt taking advantage of the scratch-free wash in under three minutes. Well excuse us for being cynical, but we’re not sure Santa really paid IMO a visit. And it’s not because the company is on the naughty list.

For a start, that Star of Bethlehem is generating some unnatural levels of light. And wait, what’s going on with the shadows? We look at shadows cast by the fence and reindeer and begin to smell the distinct whiff of rat in the air.

But wait, there’s more. We’ll gloss over the fact that Father Christmas seems to be touring around with two Mrs Christmases, both of whom look far too young for him, but there’s something weird going on with that IMO operative. Comedy holly aside, we can’t help but think he isn’t attached to his legs. Perhaps he had an unfortunate run-in with the car wash.

Santa-wash-too

We wonder where Father Christmas will be ‘spotted’ this year? Maybe he’ll be stocking up on some much needed sleigh polish. Or checking out some Magic Tree air fresheners for his sleigh. We’ve heard he’s rather partial to Forest Fresh.