The queues for fuel across the UK have finally started to shrink. However, that doesn’t mean you’ll be in-and-out of a petrol station within five minutes.
A while ago, we reported on the chap fined for spending too long at a BP garage. No, not Alan Partridge. There’s no whiff of Lynx Java about this story.
Since then, ANPR cameras and time limits have proliferated at petrol stations. But here’s the thing: if you’re spending half an hour on the forecourt, you’re part of the problem.
Anything longer than 15 minutes, frankly, is inexcusable. I’ve never got a stopwatch out, but assuming there’s no queue, the splash and dash should be completed in less than 10 minutes.
Sure, grab a Dairy Milk or a packet of Wine Gums on your way to the till, but taking anything other than the shortest route between the door and the cashier should be avoided. Pay, get into your car, then go.
The man in our original news story spent 47 minutes at a site in Croydon. Yep, forty-seven minutes. Most of that time was spent queuing behind six vehicles to use the car wash. Seriously, wouldn’t you come back another day?
Another man who received a fine wondered whether an “allowance of 45 minutes would be far more reasonable”, to which I say “NO”. Think about that for a moment: can you genuinely see a scenario in which you’d want to spend three-quarters of an hour at a petrol station?
Why? There must be better things you could be doing with your time.
Won’t get fuelled again
Almost everything is more expensive at a petrol station, so anything other than a distress purchase should wait for another day. You’re paying for convenience and the fact that the retailer makes virtually nothing out of the highway robbery you experienced at the pump.
It means that today’s petrol station is less about petrol and more about shopping. Even the petrol element is in doubt, with forecourts adding banks of chargers to prepare for our electric future.
Quite how charging fits into the maximum stay limits is a subject for another day…
I have sympathy for drivers caught unaware by the parking restrictions – I’m not siding with any retailers who have misled motorists. But I think spending the equivalent half a football match at a petrol station is time wasted, even if you’re a Man Utd fan.
Casually wandering around a Little Waitrose or M&S Simply Food looking at chilled ready meals, cat food and household cleaning products while your fellow motorists slip into a coma in the queue behind your family SUV just isn’t cricket.
When you’re back in your car, don’t spend an age checking your smartphone, arranging your shopping or having an in-depth conversation with your passenger. Make like a celebrity and get outta there.
A visit to a petrol station should be like an Olympic event. Time yourself from when you open the filler cap to the moment you’ve fastened your seat belt and are ready to go. If you beat your personal best, treat yourself to a mint Aero the next time you fill up.
No queues, no parking fines, no bother. Better for you, better for all of us.
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Considering petrol stations make their money from everything but fuel, it’s the customers that are spending money on groceries, food to go, car wash etc. that make petrol stations viable. Without such customers, we’ll end up with even fewer places to fill up. Be careful what you wish for!