In authentic Jeremy Clarkson meets excitable puppy style – THEY’RE BACK! Well, almost. By releasing a 30-second video clip of the lost – and indeed, last – episode of Top Gear in its current format, the BBC has put the internet in serious danger of collapse. Quite simply, the world can’t get enough of Messrs Clarkson, Hammond and May.
So what do we know the one-off special episode? Read on to find out.
Hang on, weren’t there two lost episodes?
Top marks for paying attention. Yes, there were two unaired episodes waiting in the wings, but the BBC has decided to edit these into one final film. Which kind of makes sense, as the news and Star In A Reasonably Priced Car did account for a fair proportion of each episode. And these are unlikely to feature in the final episode.
So we won’t be seeing Gary Lineker’s flying lap?
Nope, there’s little chance of seeing Leicester’s favourite son taking a Vauxhall Astra to the limit on the Top Gear Track. When news broke of Jeremy Clarkson’s fracas with a producer, Lineker – who was scheduled to appear as a Star In A Reasonably Priced Car – tweeted: “I don’t think I’m ever meant to appear on Top Gear.” But don’t worry, we’re sure it won’t be long before you see him advertising crisps again.
Right, so what about that final episode?
A BBC spokesperson said: “In the first film, Jeremy, Richard and James immerse themselves in the lifestyle of the traditional classic car enthusiast. Armed with affordable classics including a Fiat 124 Spider, a Peugeot 304 Cabriolet and an MGB GT, the trio set off on an adventure that includes brown beer, breakdowns and a hair raising classic car show.”
The BBC spokesperson goes on to say…
“In the second film, Clarkson, Hammond and May try to become lifestyle leisure enthusiasts with the help of some incredibly cheap lifestyle leisure vehicles. Restricted to a maximum budget of £250, the trio buy three massive mileage SUVs and then embark on a series of action-packed challenges that include battling with the Stig’s ‘Leisure Activity Cousin’ and a race with terrifying consequences for the loser.”
Last one back is an after dinner speaker
Turns out the ‘terrifying consequences’ involve doing a stint as an after dinner speaker. The 30-second clip shows the presenters, all suited and booted, with Clarkson reading out details of the challenge. He says: “The last to arrive will be doing the after dinner speech.” At which point, they run through the mud and climb into their £250 SUVs.
What do we know about the SUVs?
Hammond appears to be doing things right, as he jumps aboard a camouflaged Jeep Cherokee. We hope it’s the 4.0-litre version, Richard. May appears to opt for sense and reliability by driving a Mitsubishi Shogun Pinin. And Clarkson? Well it looks like he’s gone for a Vauxhall Frontera.
Not one, but two Vauxhall Fronteras?
The clip begins with Clarkson stood in front of a white Vauxhall Frontera, with what appears to be a homemade pick-up conversion. Later on in the film, footage from earlier in the episode shows what appears to be the same Vauxhall Frontera in its original blue paintwork. No doubt they cued the A-Team music and set to work in the garage to create the pick-up.
What could possibly go wrong?
Three close-to-death SUVs, lots of mud and a trio of caravans – it can only lead to mayhem and destruction. As James May says during the film: “I think we might have lost sight of the rules of this race slightly.” So what else is new?
What do we know about the affordable classics?
Very little. The film finishes with a voiceover saying: “Top Gear Special – only on BBC Two.” Behind the graphics you can see a blue MGB GT, a delightful Fiat 124 Sport Spider and a Peugeot 304 Cabriolet with authentic yellow headlights. We’re not sure who drives what car, but kudos to whoever’s behind the wheel of the Fiat. It looks like they’ve done it up to look like a 124 Abarth Rally. Unless, of course, it’s the real thing.
When do we get to see the final Top Gear episode?
No date has been given, but we understand it will air on BBC in the next few weeks. Hammond and May returned to the studio to piece together the final film, but this will be the last time the three presenters appear on the show together. The future of Top Gear remains unclear. Who knows, perhaps Clarkson, Hammond and May will indeed launch their own Netflix show…